6/14/11 - 6/18/11

6/14/11
I need to get off the property. Living and working in the same place basically makes it so that I never really 'go home' from work. For a while now going downtown to the local restaurant/bar has been escape enough, but I tend to drink more than I 'd like to. If I stay up here at the cabin with no source of music, no housemate, and limited movies... I'm stir crazy. I really just want to explore the woods but feel incomplete ans unsettled without a dog, especially because the trails are made by deer, not people. Sounds chicken and retarded but it's true. I want to forage for rare plants and mushrooms but would really love a companion. If I could just borrow someone's dog I'd feel OK. I've been lost off trail bushwhacking and rested assured when I can just follow my dog whether or not they have any idea which way is the right way. Not to mention athat I like to walk solo in the woods... without other humans. A walk clears my mind, keeps it moving. I find that when I sit and think by myself my mind has more of a tendency to work in circles. I tend to stress out and worry. I think about work too much, all the things I have to do. At night I sometimes even have nightmares, waking in the middle of the night panicked because I need to harvest the cilantro before it goes to seed. Silliness.



6/18/11
I spent 3 much needed days in Jersey. I was supposed to stay only 2 days but I just didn't want to leave. I stayed at my friend Teresa's house. If we were in still in 5th grade I'd call here my BFF but I like to refer to her as my favorite person now that we're grown and have known each other for over 25 years. She's like mu other half. A soul mate of friends. We can't really seem to be mad at each other. There's no conflict ever and she makes me feel normal. She's the only person who doesn't have a problem with how I live or decisions I make. She tolerates me and accepts me for whoever I am and I do the same with her. She's silly and crazy so very caring. I love her! I spend my time in NJ with her. She actually had a lighter work schedule this week so we got to spend more time together doing stuff. Going out to breakfast, planting flowers,... the dog park. I love spending time at her house even when she has to work. It's homey and comfortable and she has great fuzzy pets.

















While I was there I found myself looking on Petfinder and sent an email about adopting a puppy- a Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retriever/ Golden mix... a little girl. Exactly the knid of dog I would like to own next. She looks like a little bear! I approached my boss about getting a dog a couple of months ago and she indirectly, meaning through somebody else, told me no. Not because of anything involving me, but because the neighbors have an unruly dog that barks all day, runs away, and nips at people. They're afraid that if I had a dog their dog would behave worst. It isn't my problem that they don't control him. No dog of mine would act that badly. I believe pets are supposed to make your life better, not more stressful.